I am starting over on Tuesday!
This is a lot harder than I thought. My life is chaotic!
Friday, October 25, 2013
17 Day Diet - Day 2
Got to sleep a little later this morning because I have to work into the evening tonight. Cecil and Sulu's time clocks get messed up when I do that, but what do they have to do all day any way - SLEEP! Right....so suck it up buttercups.
My day once again starts with warm water and lemon. Is hard to get out of the habit of just having a couple cups of coffee in the morning first thing. Those are my "wake me up" things that have to get delayed a little bit. The day yesterday ended terribly as far as my intake goes, but I can't dwell, just start over again with the plan. I gained two pounds yesterday. I blame you JAMESON! DAMN!
My late breakfast consisted of two hard boiled eggs and yogurt. And of course my green tea.
Lunch will be a salad with an egg and LOTS of green veggies.
This traveling on the road and trying to eat healthy is impossible. Greens at a drive up are not very good and I just end up not getting anything. I can't eat a meat stick cause it isn't lean protein. I could eat a grilled chicken and a side salad, but I can't eat that in the car. Oh My Word!
My day once again starts with warm water and lemon. Is hard to get out of the habit of just having a couple cups of coffee in the morning first thing. Those are my "wake me up" things that have to get delayed a little bit. The day yesterday ended terribly as far as my intake goes, but I can't dwell, just start over again with the plan. I gained two pounds yesterday. I blame you JAMESON! DAMN!
My late breakfast consisted of two hard boiled eggs and yogurt. And of course my green tea.
Lunch will be a salad with an egg and LOTS of green veggies.
This traveling on the road and trying to eat healthy is impossible. Greens at a drive up are not very good and I just end up not getting anything. I can't eat a meat stick cause it isn't lean protein. I could eat a grilled chicken and a side salad, but I can't eat that in the car. Oh My Word!
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
17 Day Diet - Day 1
Day 1 of the Accelerate Cycle of the 17 Day Diet began with my cup of hot water with a half of lemon squeezed into it. This served two purposes this morning - digestion as the diet suggests, but also I have a terrible sore throat (I hope I haven't caught the strep bug that is going around). It helped to soften up the pain a little this morning so hopefully that will catch it.
The next step was stepping on my scale for my first weigh in. YIKES! While I thought it was going to be worse, I really want to knock about some digits off that number.
My breakfast consisted of this:
I am an egg girl, but scrambled egg white - not my favorite. I am scouring the book as I make myself eat these for a substitute for these. If I can add cheese and some butter they would be so much better. But alas. I ate them.
This blog will serve as my food diary, my bitch blog when I want cheesy potatoes, and my accountability scale. I know my readers (mostly friends cause who really wants to know what I am doing anyway) will say - DUDE PUT DOWN THE CHIPS AND STEP AWAY! - when I need them to.
My snack
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Apparently Chick, Monkey and Flower are very excited that I get yogurt for my morning snack.
Ran home to let big boy outside and put together my salad.
GREENS, TUNA, I threw in some more veggies like brocoli and carrots and 2 Tbs of White balsamic vinegar mixed with 1 Tbs of Olive Oil. Oh yeah and don't forget my green tea. It tasted pretty good and I am not super full, but satisfied. The portion control is difficult to get used to.....but I must!
Going out after work with peeps from the office, I will cheat with ONE drink and then back to the grind. That didn't take long huh? OH WELL!
The group of us went out to Mad Meatball and 3 Jameson rocks and two pizza slices later I have to try again tomorrow. So day 2 will be a redo. NO more drink......gonna take some cold medicine and hit the hay.
The next step was stepping on my scale for my first weigh in. YIKES! While I thought it was going to be worse, I really want to knock about some digits off that number.
My breakfast consisted of this:
I am an egg girl, but scrambled egg white - not my favorite. I am scouring the book as I make myself eat these for a substitute for these. If I can add cheese and some butter they would be so much better. But alas. I ate them.
This blog will serve as my food diary, my bitch blog when I want cheesy potatoes, and my accountability scale. I know my readers (mostly friends cause who really wants to know what I am doing anyway) will say - DUDE PUT DOWN THE CHIPS AND STEP AWAY! - when I need them to.
My snack
Apparently Chick, Monkey and Flower are very excited that I get yogurt for my morning snack.
Ran home to let big boy outside and put together my salad.
GREENS, TUNA, I threw in some more veggies like brocoli and carrots and 2 Tbs of White balsamic vinegar mixed with 1 Tbs of Olive Oil. Oh yeah and don't forget my green tea. It tasted pretty good and I am not super full, but satisfied. The portion control is difficult to get used to.....but I must!
Going out after work with peeps from the office, I will cheat with ONE drink and then back to the grind. That didn't take long huh? OH WELL!
The group of us went out to Mad Meatball and 3 Jameson rocks and two pizza slices later I have to try again tomorrow. So day 2 will be a redo. NO more drink......gonna take some cold medicine and hit the hay.
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
17 Day Diet - Day 0
Tomorrow starts Day 1 of the 17 day diet. I know many people that have been very successful on this diet: Friends from NW Iowa and a couple people at work. This diet makes sense. And the important thing is that this is not just a diet - it is a way of eating that keeps your metabolism going. A change in how I eat. The first 17 days are greens, lean proteins (chicken and fish), probiotic yogurts, no fruit after 2:00 pm, green tea and LOTS of water. Paying attention to portion sizes and following the plan.
To read more about it, check out this website: 17 Day Diet
So my plan is to blog every day about this journey.
Why am I doing this? Health. It isn't about shame about my body or wanting to be a twig. It's about my achy ankles, my tired feet, and the crazy blood tests that I have to have every 6 months because I am teetering on the edge of being diabetic along with high cholesterol. It is important for me to have a goal of not having to take a handful of pills every morning. It is time! I am tired! Sick and tired!
I look at this as one day at a time. I am not naive enough to think that I won't have slip ups. But it is a journey not an event.
So here we go! I won't write how much I weigh, but I will write about how much I lose and how many sizes I drop in this process.
Let this journey begin.
To read more about it, check out this website: 17 Day Diet
So my plan is to blog every day about this journey.
I look at this as one day at a time. I am not naive enough to think that I won't have slip ups. But it is a journey not an event.
So here we go! I won't write how much I weigh, but I will write about how much I lose and how many sizes I drop in this process.
Let this journey begin.
Monday, August 5, 2013
Maybe there is a way out of the cage where you live in.....
The words are moving within me again. The bubbling and the churning that has reached the top of my chest. I have a tendency to try to keep it all there until the pressure cooker can't take it anymore. It feels like I can explode in a torrent of tears. But I keep the lid on because it is safer that way. I blame all those times I heard "Shut up or I will give you something to cry about" when I was a kid. Crying is weak. And frankly a part of me thinks that if I start, I won't be able to stop
And then something happens. I get a sign. A BIG FUCKING sign! Music talks to me. It saved my life as a kid. Helped me deal as a teenager and carries me through stress and strain every day. And my favorites are eclectic and strange at times. My shuffle goes from Dixie Chicks to Lady Gaga to Justin Beiber to Chad Elliott to Mackelmore and Ryan Lewis to Mat D and the Profane Saints. But a song that brings that bubbling to a head finds itself playing on the radio at the most appropriate time. The time when for whatever reason I need it the most. A sign!
October 2011, Ms. Sara Bareilles showed us what it is like to be with the King of Everything.........."Let Me Hold Your Crown Babe"! It was the theme to a very important road trip in my life. And guess what HERE SHE IS AGAIN!
Nothing's gonna hurt you the way that words do
When they settle 'neath your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
But I wonder what would happen if you...
Say what you want to say and let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be BRAVE
Show me how big your brave is.........
The lid slipped off the pressure cooker a bit and let some of the churning toxins out. So I keep hearing her speak to me at the strangest times. And then I attend a conference for work. A mom is speaking about her child being abducted and the tragedy that befell the family with that child's murder. She started a foundation to assist other parents of abducted and murdered children. This beautiful little angel would draw pictures for her mother and on those pictures she wrote "BE BRAVE". The theme for this foundation is BE BRAVE. I was taken aback. There are those words again.
Let your words be anything but empty........why don't you tell them the truth.
So today, I am meeting with my counselor. And I am telling her about the Sulu moment and the conference moment. And the pressure cooker is at maximum today. Things are going to boil over. Lots of things are piling and churning and reacting like acid causing pain. No deep breaths or cleansing thoughts today. Just sadness and melancholy and anger and pain.
Stop holding your tongue
Lots of tears during the session. Think I am done, the pressure is released a bit. Get in my car, start to head home. Turned the radio on......Ms Sara! SIGN AGAIN AND AGAIN. Driving with streaming eyes and snotty nose in rush hour traffic is not my idea of safe driving but I didn't care at that moment.
How big is my brave?
May be one of these days you can let the light in.
SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY AND LET THE WORDS FALL OUT
HONESTLY
I WANT TO SEE YOU BE BRAVE!!!
I need to be brave! I need to let the light in and move free from the cage. The tides of grief move in and out like the ocean. Bravery through the high tide and the low tide both. Breathe, scream, cry and swear!
I WANT TO SEE ME BE BRAVE! LET THE WORDS FALL OUT! HONESTLY! I WANT TO SEE ME BE BRAVE!
I am trying.........
And then something happens. I get a sign. A BIG FUCKING sign! Music talks to me. It saved my life as a kid. Helped me deal as a teenager and carries me through stress and strain every day. And my favorites are eclectic and strange at times. My shuffle goes from Dixie Chicks to Lady Gaga to Justin Beiber to Chad Elliott to Mackelmore and Ryan Lewis to Mat D and the Profane Saints. But a song that brings that bubbling to a head finds itself playing on the radio at the most appropriate time. The time when for whatever reason I need it the most. A sign!
October 2011, Ms. Sara Bareilles showed us what it is like to be with the King of Everything.........."Let Me Hold Your Crown Babe"! It was the theme to a very important road trip in my life. And guess what HERE SHE IS AGAIN!
Nothing's gonna hurt you the way that words do
When they settle 'neath your skin
Kept on the inside and no sunlight
Sometimes a shadow wins
But I wonder what would happen if you...
Say what you want to say and let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be BRAVE
The first time I had a reaction to this song, I was sitting in my dining room working on bills or a project, and the meaning of the words hit me hard! Sobs erupted enough to worry my Sulu dog so that he came up to me and rested his head on my lap with his "it's okay mom" puppy eyes.
The lid slipped off the pressure cooker a bit and let some of the churning toxins out. So I keep hearing her speak to me at the strangest times. And then I attend a conference for work. A mom is speaking about her child being abducted and the tragedy that befell the family with that child's murder. She started a foundation to assist other parents of abducted and murdered children. This beautiful little angel would draw pictures for her mother and on those pictures she wrote "BE BRAVE". The theme for this foundation is BE BRAVE. I was taken aback. There are those words again.
Let your words be anything but empty........why don't you tell them the truth.
So today, I am meeting with my counselor. And I am telling her about the Sulu moment and the conference moment. And the pressure cooker is at maximum today. Things are going to boil over. Lots of things are piling and churning and reacting like acid causing pain. No deep breaths or cleansing thoughts today. Just sadness and melancholy and anger and pain.
Stop holding your tongue
Lots of tears during the session. Think I am done, the pressure is released a bit. Get in my car, start to head home. Turned the radio on......Ms Sara! SIGN AGAIN AND AGAIN. Driving with streaming eyes and snotty nose in rush hour traffic is not my idea of safe driving but I didn't care at that moment.
How big is my brave?
May be one of these days you can let the light in.
SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO SAY AND LET THE WORDS FALL OUT
HONESTLY
I WANT TO SEE YOU BE BRAVE!!!
I need to be brave! I need to let the light in and move free from the cage. The tides of grief move in and out like the ocean. Bravery through the high tide and the low tide both. Breathe, scream, cry and swear!
I WANT TO SEE ME BE BRAVE! LET THE WORDS FALL OUT! HONESTLY! I WANT TO SEE ME BE BRAVE!
I am trying.........
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Full Moon Mayhem
The title makes it sound like there was debauchery and mischief. But alas, just a bunch a seasoned women talking and catching up. It was a great night filled with TOO MUCH WINE and old friends. I need to do that more often. Both the friends and the wine part!
The moon to me signifies a female. The full moon represents the end of mother earth's cycle. She is full and ripe and ready to purge the month's worth of growth. This purging prepares her for the new moon and the cycle begins again.
When we planned the full moon party, I wanted it to be a connection to her - a connection to the earth. One of the ceremonies that I found was a burning/cleansing. We took a piece of wood (mine was an old paint stick) and wrote down the things that we wanted to clean from ourselves. This was a bit difficult to do because one thinks about labels. Expectations of ourselves and expectations from others were at the top of my list. We all shared those words and then tossed the sticks into the fire.
Another cycle done. Another chapter turned. And it starts again. So is life. It keeps waxing and waning just like her.
This particular full moon in April was called the Pink Moon. According to the farmer's almanac "the name came from the herb moss pink or wild ground phlox which is one of the earliest widespread flowers of the Spring". It also was a lunar eclipse. Unfortunately, we could not see it on this side of the world in the western hemisphere.
When it rose, it was beautiful. HUGE on the horizon and glowing pink then orange. Being in the middle of the country (in the trailerhood), the sky was dark unlike the urban area that is lit up by the lights. This made for some great star and moon watching. Once she rose, the stars said, "have at it lady.......we will go dim while you run across the sky".
The moon to me signifies a female. The full moon represents the end of mother earth's cycle. She is full and ripe and ready to purge the month's worth of growth. This purging prepares her for the new moon and the cycle begins again.
When we planned the full moon party, I wanted it to be a connection to her - a connection to the earth. One of the ceremonies that I found was a burning/cleansing. We took a piece of wood (mine was an old paint stick) and wrote down the things that we wanted to clean from ourselves. This was a bit difficult to do because one thinks about labels. Expectations of ourselves and expectations from others were at the top of my list. We all shared those words and then tossed the sticks into the fire.
Another cycle done. Another chapter turned. And it starts again. So is life. It keeps waxing and waning just like her.
Friday, April 19, 2013
Public Toilet Procedures
Okay - I bet you are totally trying to figure out what the heck is coming next.
Well you guessed it - people's public toilet procedures. Particularly women's (although I have been known to occasionally use a men's room when the line is too long) because I am not sure what happens in the urinals or troughs or individual stalls.
So have you every wondered as you are sitting in the bathroom doing your BID-NESS what other women do when they close that stall door. I think about it. I know.......I think I may need a hobby.
I hear that inevitable bathroom door open and then stall door close. This is the point when I say, 'come on, couldn't you have just given me a little more time? Now I have to worry about the noises I make since I WAS the only one in here'. All this in my head of course.
But the only thing that women do that is consistent is opening the bathroom door and closing the stall door. From that point on, it is a free for all of strategies for cleanliness.
I could keep going about the cleanliness of the bathroom but that might be reserved for another post. A once work neighbor told me that she judges restaurants by how clean the bathrooms are. She said that "if the bathroom is clean, the kitchen is clean" - so she will eat there. I tend to believe her although it is very rare that I say "could you wait to sit us until I check out your shitter". Although I might get away with that if I travel to Missoura or Arkansas.
Any way what I want to discuss is what do you do when you close that stall door? Every person has their habit.
Do you look for the hook to hang your purse and coat? If there isn't a hook for your purse, do you put it on the floor? YIKES -- See previous comment about cleanliness. Do you hold it in your lap while you are peeing. AWKWARD at best.
Do you pull the toilet seat cover paper thingy out and try to position it on the toilet cover so as to avoid germs and coodies from other folks?
Do you take strips of toilet paper and line the seat rim and then sit down? What happens if one of those strips sticks to your butt? Then what?
Do you take toilet paper and wipe the seat down as a pseudo-sanitizer?
Or do you squat/lean/hover pee over the top of the seat so as not to touch anything? And if you do, be honest -- have you ever peed on yourself?
Or do you just sit and let her rip? The hurried, relief of a pee. There is nothing like it. OOPS! I digress.
As I sit in the stall contemplating the noises coming from the other stalls, I imagine that I can tell what other folks are doing? I can tell when Suzie Tennis Shoes is placing precise strips of toilet paper on the seat so as not to touch her skin to the seat where other skin has rested.
I can tell when Jamie Cute Heels is hovering because her feet are shaking underneath the stalls. Not that I am looking THAT close.....really......I am not.
Or when Felicia Flip Flop is using her hand sanitizer on toilet paper to actually clean the seat before she plants herself down.
So what do you do? And why do you do it? Are there really any germs that can live that long on a public toilet seat? If there are germs are they going to absorb thru your skin or are you rubbing your lady parts all over the seat? (Okay that may have been a little too much - sorry about that)
Me? I am all about the sit and let her rip. Which reminds me the topic of my next blog is going to be "sounds heard in the public bathroom". Because if you can't let it rip - literally - in the bathroom, where can you let it rip?
Well you guessed it - people's public toilet procedures. Particularly women's (although I have been known to occasionally use a men's room when the line is too long) because I am not sure what happens in the urinals or troughs or individual stalls.
So have you every wondered as you are sitting in the bathroom doing your BID-NESS what other women do when they close that stall door. I think about it. I know.......I think I may need a hobby.
I hear that inevitable bathroom door open and then stall door close. This is the point when I say, 'come on, couldn't you have just given me a little more time? Now I have to worry about the noises I make since I WAS the only one in here'. All this in my head of course.
But the only thing that women do that is consistent is opening the bathroom door and closing the stall door. From that point on, it is a free for all of strategies for cleanliness.
I could keep going about the cleanliness of the bathroom but that might be reserved for another post. A once work neighbor told me that she judges restaurants by how clean the bathrooms are. She said that "if the bathroom is clean, the kitchen is clean" - so she will eat there. I tend to believe her although it is very rare that I say "could you wait to sit us until I check out your shitter". Although I might get away with that if I travel to Missoura or Arkansas.
Any way what I want to discuss is what do you do when you close that stall door? Every person has their habit.
Do you look for the hook to hang your purse and coat? If there isn't a hook for your purse, do you put it on the floor? YIKES -- See previous comment about cleanliness. Do you hold it in your lap while you are peeing. AWKWARD at best.
Do you pull the toilet seat cover paper thingy out and try to position it on the toilet cover so as to avoid germs and coodies from other folks?
Do you take strips of toilet paper and line the seat rim and then sit down? What happens if one of those strips sticks to your butt? Then what?
Do you take toilet paper and wipe the seat down as a pseudo-sanitizer?
Or do you squat/lean/hover pee over the top of the seat so as not to touch anything? And if you do, be honest -- have you ever peed on yourself?
Or do you just sit and let her rip? The hurried, relief of a pee. There is nothing like it. OOPS! I digress.
As I sit in the stall contemplating the noises coming from the other stalls, I imagine that I can tell what other folks are doing? I can tell when Suzie Tennis Shoes is placing precise strips of toilet paper on the seat so as not to touch her skin to the seat where other skin has rested.
I can tell when Jamie Cute Heels is hovering because her feet are shaking underneath the stalls. Not that I am looking THAT close.....really......I am not.
Or when Felicia Flip Flop is using her hand sanitizer on toilet paper to actually clean the seat before she plants herself down.
So what do you do? And why do you do it? Are there really any germs that can live that long on a public toilet seat? If there are germs are they going to absorb thru your skin or are you rubbing your lady parts all over the seat? (Okay that may have been a little too much - sorry about that)
Me? I am all about the sit and let her rip. Which reminds me the topic of my next blog is going to be "sounds heard in the public bathroom". Because if you can't let it rip - literally - in the bathroom, where can you let it rip?
Monday, April 8, 2013
Support, family and oh, yeah food!
Needless to say this week has been a roller coaster experience. NO words or actions can make the pain go away from my friend. But I know a certainty from all of this is that she will be okay.
The support and love that surrounds her is a web of comfort like no other I have seen. Watching this dynamic is something to behold. I have been so blessed to witness this amazing energy fill the room. They don't sweep in when there are tears, they just BE. BE there for her with words, memories, and laughter. It is a GOD thing.
It is a good thing that my weigh-ins have stopped, because not only is the support something magical - the FOOD has been divine. Sunday dinner yesterday was from the hands of the best bed and breakfast chef around. Check out the Morning Glory Bed and Breakfast in Cherokee Iowa. Sister Sue made a Pot Roast, Carrots, Potatoes, Gravy (OH MY GRAVY!), Almond Green Beans and Fruit Salad. We sat at the large dining room table and shared food and stories and wisdom. It doesn't get any better than that for healing. Thank you Sue for a fantastic meal!
Yesterday was a turned corner. She will heal. She will continue to move forward on her journey. But for me, the most important AH HA has been that family support is so very necessary. Coming together in faith and family (and food) is the best healing salve in the world. And I know they are so very good at allowing her wounds to be tended. As I said before, the bucket is beginning to weld back together. Yesterday, the family took a turn at the torch.
The support and love that surrounds her is a web of comfort like no other I have seen. Watching this dynamic is something to behold. I have been so blessed to witness this amazing energy fill the room. They don't sweep in when there are tears, they just BE. BE there for her with words, memories, and laughter. It is a GOD thing.
It is a good thing that my weigh-ins have stopped, because not only is the support something magical - the FOOD has been divine. Sunday dinner yesterday was from the hands of the best bed and breakfast chef around. Check out the Morning Glory Bed and Breakfast in Cherokee Iowa. Sister Sue made a Pot Roast, Carrots, Potatoes, Gravy (OH MY GRAVY!), Almond Green Beans and Fruit Salad. We sat at the large dining room table and shared food and stories and wisdom. It doesn't get any better than that for healing. Thank you Sue for a fantastic meal!
Yesterday was a turned corner. She will heal. She will continue to move forward on her journey. But for me, the most important AH HA has been that family support is so very necessary. Coming together in faith and family (and food) is the best healing salve in the world. And I know they are so very good at allowing her wounds to be tended. As I said before, the bucket is beginning to weld back together. Yesterday, the family took a turn at the torch.
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Holy Buckets
In most cases, that is how I start an exclamation that is an exasperation. Usually it goes something like "Holy Buckets Batman". Makes no sense I know, but it makes me feel good when I say it.
But today Holy Buckets should actually be spelled HOLE-Y BUCKETS. My bucket feels full of holes. While it could be an exclamation, it is just a quiet statement that expresses how I feel when I am spent. All the energy and life joy is drained from my bucket that today looks like swiss cheese.
A really good friend is going through the most difficult struggle and I want to help her as much as I can, but no words can repair it. Not enough hugs in the universe to make it better. One day things are great and plans and dreams have been discussed and decided. Within hours, that has ripped apart.
Her bucket is like a bomb went off and there are metal shards strewn about the house. The process to repairing that will take so much time and energy and today she tells me that she is not sure how she can survive this.
My heart breaks.
She has within her to know what will repair her bucket. The shards are just too sharp for her to remember what it takes. The wounds are too raw and fresh.
Talking to her on the morning that she finishes the public process of saying goodbye to her husband, the pain is so very sharp. No words work. We always wish we had the correct thing to "fix" it. That elusive magic wand.
I don't say, "time will make this better" because today I am not confident that it will make it better.
Today she moves through the grief like a fog. Tomorrow I hope for her she can start the healing journey. I do know that the only thing I can do is try to bring out a welder to help repair her bucket and tomorrow she can take over the welding rod to mend the joints. As soon as that bucket is put back together, she can begin to fill it again.
But today Holy Buckets should actually be spelled HOLE-Y BUCKETS. My bucket feels full of holes. While it could be an exclamation, it is just a quiet statement that expresses how I feel when I am spent. All the energy and life joy is drained from my bucket that today looks like swiss cheese.
A really good friend is going through the most difficult struggle and I want to help her as much as I can, but no words can repair it. Not enough hugs in the universe to make it better. One day things are great and plans and dreams have been discussed and decided. Within hours, that has ripped apart.
Her bucket is like a bomb went off and there are metal shards strewn about the house. The process to repairing that will take so much time and energy and today she tells me that she is not sure how she can survive this.
My heart breaks.
She has within her to know what will repair her bucket. The shards are just too sharp for her to remember what it takes. The wounds are too raw and fresh.
Talking to her on the morning that she finishes the public process of saying goodbye to her husband, the pain is so very sharp. No words work. We always wish we had the correct thing to "fix" it. That elusive magic wand.
I don't say, "time will make this better" because today I am not confident that it will make it better.
Today she moves through the grief like a fog. Tomorrow I hope for her she can start the healing journey. I do know that the only thing I can do is try to bring out a welder to help repair her bucket and tomorrow she can take over the welding rod to mend the joints. As soon as that bucket is put back together, she can begin to fill it again.
Saturday, March 30, 2013
The amazing, incredible powerhouse that is P!NK
I started this post right when I got back from Chicago and the incomparable P!NK. I didn't finish it because I didn't think I could put into words the experience from that concert. And then I found some YouTube videos to help me. So here we go.......
We started with taking the MegaBus from Des Moines to Iowa City, picked up Kara and then on our way to Chicago. That sounds all fine and well, but the driver was terrible AND we were TWO hours late getting into Chicago. TWO HOURS! So not only do airlines run late apparently the bus system does too.
Any way, Keetah and I navigated downtown to the CTA station and boarded the train to head toward the airport since our hotel was near O'Hare. A few subway stops later, we found our shuttle and we were tucked into the hotel and decided we needed to eat at the Harry Carey's Steakhouse.
Shared some good food and a couples drinks. Bartender kicked us out and suggested that we go across the street to another place that stayed open later. We "squirreled" it across the street (if you don't know what squirreling is it is when individuals that May or may not be drunk run across lanes of traffic without using a crosswalk - TEE HEE) with six lanes of traffic -- YIKES - and found the place he was talking about. Stayed there for a little while and headed back to the hotel.
The next day we headed downtown to meet up with the gang, hang out with in-laws, supper and go to the concert.
Enough about me. What about the concert?
The United Center is HUGE!
We were back a bit from the stage and I realized I forgot my camera when I was on the BUS! UGH! So phone would have to do. It didn't. Just too far away. SO I pulled some YouTube videos down and they are closer any way and you get the idea. :)
The beginning of the show is like a broadway drama. The theme is "The Truth About Love". We see a video of P!nk drinking her man troubles away.
SIDEBAR!!! Speaking of Man troubles. I noticed right away that there were very few men at this concert. I think in our nosebleed section there were maybe 3 men. Lots and Lots of women, but very few men. HUH?
Any who -- then this is the first song! RAISE YOUR GLASS!!!!!
On my feet already much to the annoyance of the group behind me. Two things folks: I AM SHORT! YOU CAN SEE OVER ME! And IT'S A FREAKIN' CONCERT! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO STAND UP! GEEZ!
The night kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger. Lots of acrobats, great vocals, amazing bodies - I mean dancers. Here are a few more videos.
At this point, this was my favorite performance - I was speechless when it was done - Sober - it starts off a little slow, but keep with it. :)
Then.....oh my.......then she broke it out OLD SCHOOL! First CD back in the day (okay that feels weird cause it wasn't THAT long ago, but I believe there were folks in the crowd that had never heard these songs before) YEP! I was up dancing! LOVE those first songs! There you go and more
The most beautiful performance was Glitter in the Air
And the FINALE --So What
All in all this was the most amazing concert I have EVER been to. It was better than any broadway show that I have ever seen. And as we were waiting for our crew at our 'meet up' place after the show, I saw two women. I am going to assume they were mother and daughter and they were both sobbing - overcome with emotion from this incredible performer.
I have been saying since then when people ask me how it was that if I were independently wealthy, I would follow her around the country and the world just to see that performance over and over again. I know. I am obsessed.
But what is the one thing that will make my post-P!nk euphoria better? SHE IS COMING TO DES MOINES. Tickets go on sale to the general public in 20 minutes as I write this. I have my fingers crossed that I can get 4 seats pretty close to the stage. May the ticketmaster, internet ticket purchasing goddesses be in my favor so I can get good seats. FINGERS CROSSED!
We started with taking the MegaBus from Des Moines to Iowa City, picked up Kara and then on our way to Chicago. That sounds all fine and well, but the driver was terrible AND we were TWO hours late getting into Chicago. TWO HOURS! So not only do airlines run late apparently the bus system does too.
Any way, Keetah and I navigated downtown to the CTA station and boarded the train to head toward the airport since our hotel was near O'Hare. A few subway stops later, we found our shuttle and we were tucked into the hotel and decided we needed to eat at the Harry Carey's Steakhouse.
The next day we headed downtown to meet up with the gang, hang out with in-laws, supper and go to the concert.
Enough about me. What about the concert?
The United Center is HUGE!
We were back a bit from the stage and I realized I forgot my camera when I was on the BUS! UGH! So phone would have to do. It didn't. Just too far away. SO I pulled some YouTube videos down and they are closer any way and you get the idea. :)
The beginning of the show is like a broadway drama. The theme is "The Truth About Love". We see a video of P!nk drinking her man troubles away.
SIDEBAR!!! Speaking of Man troubles. I noticed right away that there were very few men at this concert. I think in our nosebleed section there were maybe 3 men. Lots and Lots of women, but very few men. HUH?
Any who -- then this is the first song! RAISE YOUR GLASS!!!!!
On my feet already much to the annoyance of the group behind me. Two things folks: I AM SHORT! YOU CAN SEE OVER ME! And IT'S A FREAKIN' CONCERT! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO STAND UP! GEEZ!
The night kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger. Lots of acrobats, great vocals, amazing bodies - I mean dancers. Here are a few more videos.
At this point, this was my favorite performance - I was speechless when it was done - Sober - it starts off a little slow, but keep with it. :)
Then.....oh my.......then she broke it out OLD SCHOOL! First CD back in the day (okay that feels weird cause it wasn't THAT long ago, but I believe there were folks in the crowd that had never heard these songs before) YEP! I was up dancing! LOVE those first songs! There you go and more
The most beautiful performance was Glitter in the Air
And the FINALE --So What
All in all this was the most amazing concert I have EVER been to. It was better than any broadway show that I have ever seen. And as we were waiting for our crew at our 'meet up' place after the show, I saw two women. I am going to assume they were mother and daughter and they were both sobbing - overcome with emotion from this incredible performer.
I have been saying since then when people ask me how it was that if I were independently wealthy, I would follow her around the country and the world just to see that performance over and over again. I know. I am obsessed.
But what is the one thing that will make my post-P!nk euphoria better? SHE IS COMING TO DES MOINES. Tickets go on sale to the general public in 20 minutes as I write this. I have my fingers crossed that I can get 4 seats pretty close to the stage. May the ticketmaster, internet ticket purchasing goddesses be in my favor so I can get good seats. FINGERS CROSSED!
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Random (or are they) quotes that I have heard this week
I love quotes and saying by famous and not so famous people. I have a wipe board in my cubicle at work that has quotes that I change up all the time. But this week seems to be a particular week of quotes that have jumped out at me. Not just jumped out, they have slapped me in the face.
Last night I went to an another amazing concert at the GrapeVine. Daphne Willis and Korby Lenker - These are two very talented musicians and I once again am so fortunate to get to hear some amazing music here in Central Iowa. Check both of them out on YouTube.
But Ms. Daphne sang a song and a lyric gave me a little JOLT........."Quit yelling at me from the backyard I'm in the front of the house" - I was like "what did you just say".....and then she sang it again "Quit yelling at me from the backyard I'm in the front of the house"............Daphne, are you talking to me? But seriously, my brain went into overdrive working out that lyric.
Then today, I am working on my Leadership class and working on the Unit about Followers in Leadership. This quote "Leave our world better than it was when we came here". That is what we do when we do victim services work. What is my legacy? THAT is my hope "that I leave the world a better than it was when I cam here". I think I am on my way with that.
Continuing to read through my Leadership class, another one BANGS out of the textbook. This is an excerpt from Nelson Mandella's famous inaugural speech from 1994. He was talking to the people of South Africa, but it resounds with everyone.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory.....that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
INDEED Mr. Mandella. INDEED!
Last night I went to an another amazing concert at the GrapeVine. Daphne Willis and Korby Lenker - These are two very talented musicians and I once again am so fortunate to get to hear some amazing music here in Central Iowa. Check both of them out on YouTube.
But Ms. Daphne sang a song and a lyric gave me a little JOLT........."Quit yelling at me from the backyard I'm in the front of the house" - I was like "what did you just say".....and then she sang it again "Quit yelling at me from the backyard I'm in the front of the house"............Daphne, are you talking to me? But seriously, my brain went into overdrive working out that lyric.
Then today, I am working on my Leadership class and working on the Unit about Followers in Leadership. This quote "Leave our world better than it was when we came here". That is what we do when we do victim services work. What is my legacy? THAT is my hope "that I leave the world a better than it was when I cam here". I think I am on my way with that.
Continuing to read through my Leadership class, another one BANGS out of the textbook. This is an excerpt from Nelson Mandella's famous inaugural speech from 1994. He was talking to the people of South Africa, but it resounds with everyone.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you NOT to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory.....that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
INDEED Mr. Mandella. INDEED!
Sunday, March 3, 2013
What am I listening too?
Today (tonight really) is the day I get to be enamored once again with Mr. Adam Levine. I saw him and Maroon 5 a few years ago when they were the headline and Augustana (fell in love with them) and Counting Crows (the real reason my husband went with) opened for them in an outdoor amphitheater in Kansas City. They were promoting their "It Won't Be Soon Before Long" CD. They have had three releases since then and I absolutely LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this new one "Overexposed". So think of me when I am dancing along with my "t-shirt man". I am very excited. It will be worth it to drive in a snow storm on the way home.
And by the way - stay tuned for a review of the P!NK concert.....headed to Chicago next weekend for a P!NK weekend! Fingers are tingling with anticipation. And I am blessed to love music and see live music this month of March.
I fortunately had the pleasure to be invited to a house concert with my favorite DSM (Coon Rapids really) musician and his amazingly talented harmonizer (and promoter) Bonita in Audubon on Friday night. My friend from Kansas City has a sister in Audubon and they were hosting Chad Elliott for a house concert. They weren't sure what to think about us (Keetah and I) at this venue. I think the words were "thank you for your enthusiasm". That is code for "you were too loud". I have known this amazing song writer for a very long time - longer than I think he would like to admit to anyone. And I am continually amazed at the body of work that comes out of those guitar strings. A great story teller and am amazing talent. Check him out at www.chadelliott.net.
Chad is releasing a new CD called "So Sang the Crow". His CD release party was last night at The GrapeVine, LLC here in Des Moines. I was not able to attend. BOO! But, I have a copy and am in love with it. If you have Spotify, you can listen to it there as well.
My favorite song so far is "Oak Tree Grave". The guitar riff that repeats is mesmerizing and the microphone distortion is hypnotic. The title track "So Sang the Crow" is a close second. I am however sure that will change as I listen to it over and over and over again. I am serious. I have ALL of his CDs and try to get to as many shows as I can. THIS CD is his best! The production quality alone is incredible. But add in the dulcimer and the other instruments it just explodes with amazing sound and takes you right to the front row of one of his shows.
BRAVO CHAD! BRAVO! This will be rocking my cubicle and my little red car for the next few months!
Now. Here is where I need a favor from you. There are two things that need to come together. Planets or star alignment if you will. Some of you know that I am a little obsessed the with show Sons of Anarchy. It is my guilty pleasure. The boys from SAMCRO entertain and shock me most of the time.
Chad has a song that would be perfect for this show called "RAPTURE". It didn't make the CD, but am confident that it will the next time. Here it is on YouTube -- Chad Elliott - Rapture.
I am starting a Facebook campaign. Sons of Anarchy has a Facebook Page. I am posting this YouTube video of this song every other day to it. If you are a CHAD fan, help me out! Post on their Facebook page too. Hoping that it gets through the minions that take care of the social media for SOA to Kurt Sutter or Katey Sagal. CROSSING MY FINGERS!
At the very least, please buy his CD. Go to his website, call the GrapeVine or email or message me and I will hook you up. And consider him for a house concert. It is a great way to bring your friends together, share some food and beverage, and listen to an amazing artist! Oh and invite me cuz, I bring "enthusiasm".
And by the way - stay tuned for a review of the P!NK concert.....headed to Chicago next weekend for a P!NK weekend! Fingers are tingling with anticipation. And I am blessed to love music and see live music this month of March.
I fortunately had the pleasure to be invited to a house concert with my favorite DSM (Coon Rapids really) musician and his amazingly talented harmonizer (and promoter) Bonita in Audubon on Friday night. My friend from Kansas City has a sister in Audubon and they were hosting Chad Elliott for a house concert. They weren't sure what to think about us (Keetah and I) at this venue. I think the words were "thank you for your enthusiasm". That is code for "you were too loud". I have known this amazing song writer for a very long time - longer than I think he would like to admit to anyone. And I am continually amazed at the body of work that comes out of those guitar strings. A great story teller and am amazing talent. Check him out at www.chadelliott.net.
Chad is releasing a new CD called "So Sang the Crow". His CD release party was last night at The GrapeVine, LLC here in Des Moines. I was not able to attend. BOO! But, I have a copy and am in love with it. If you have Spotify, you can listen to it there as well.
My favorite song so far is "Oak Tree Grave". The guitar riff that repeats is mesmerizing and the microphone distortion is hypnotic. The title track "So Sang the Crow" is a close second. I am however sure that will change as I listen to it over and over and over again. I am serious. I have ALL of his CDs and try to get to as many shows as I can. THIS CD is his best! The production quality alone is incredible. But add in the dulcimer and the other instruments it just explodes with amazing sound and takes you right to the front row of one of his shows.
BRAVO CHAD! BRAVO! This will be rocking my cubicle and my little red car for the next few months!
Now. Here is where I need a favor from you. There are two things that need to come together. Planets or star alignment if you will. Some of you know that I am a little obsessed the with show Sons of Anarchy. It is my guilty pleasure. The boys from SAMCRO entertain and shock me most of the time.
Chad has a song that would be perfect for this show called "RAPTURE". It didn't make the CD, but am confident that it will the next time. Here it is on YouTube -- Chad Elliott - Rapture.
I am starting a Facebook campaign. Sons of Anarchy has a Facebook Page. I am posting this YouTube video of this song every other day to it. If you are a CHAD fan, help me out! Post on their Facebook page too. Hoping that it gets through the minions that take care of the social media for SOA to Kurt Sutter or Katey Sagal. CROSSING MY FINGERS!
At the very least, please buy his CD. Go to his website, call the GrapeVine or email or message me and I will hook you up. And consider him for a house concert. It is a great way to bring your friends together, share some food and beverage, and listen to an amazing artist! Oh and invite me cuz, I bring "enthusiasm".
May an old oak tree grow from my grave,
Let everyone know how much I gave.
Think on me beneath the cool, cool shade,
Of an old oak tree grown from my grave.
Saturday, March 2, 2013
Write, delete, write, delete
What is wrong with me? That is an interesting question with many answers depending who you ask.
But in this context, I mean.......what is the deal? I write a blog, delete the blog. Write another blog, and delete the blog. I have done this four times in the last four weeks.
The only explanation that I have is that it doesn't 'feel right' to post what I have written so I didn't.
So here I sit trying again. Words swirling in my brain, rolling around and tornado like to the end of my fingers to the keyboard. I am watching for swollen and split fingernails. And staccato, broken sentence structure and grammar, with ALL CAPS.
I think I need to make a U-turn.
But in this context, I mean.......what is the deal? I write a blog, delete the blog. Write another blog, and delete the blog. I have done this four times in the last four weeks.
The only explanation that I have is that it doesn't 'feel right' to post what I have written so I didn't.
So here I sit trying again. Words swirling in my brain, rolling around and tornado like to the end of my fingers to the keyboard. I am watching for swollen and split fingernails. And staccato, broken sentence structure and grammar, with ALL CAPS.
I think I need to make a U-turn.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Star Gifts
Star gifts. These are given each year at my home church in Spencer. Epiphany Sunday - the first Sunday after the new year - is when we talk about the gift of the Magi. The Magi ventured long distances by following a star to see the baby and brought gifts to honor and celebrate his birth. And as the scripture says "they returned home by another route".
A basket is passed around the pews with brightly colored STARS with a single word placed on them. The idea is to pick that word and it will have meaning to you throughout this next year. As a star gift, it will mean either the gifts I possess that I will use this next year or a gift that I need to recognize and obtain.
Last year my gift was "crafty". When I drew that one I was confused and it took me almost a half a year to figure that one out (and really not sure at this writing if it is correct or that was the intent). Was it because I was learning from a great teacher how to construct or re-purpose things? Was it because I was to figure out a "crafty" way to communicate, move through and express my thoughts with others? I say both because both of those things are and have happened.
The year before that my word was "sabbath". That one didn't take me as long to work through. I "pulled" that gift at a time when I was working seven days a week and all thoughts and feelings had to do with a job. There was not time for me and reflection and being still. Many changes since then in my life and I think that I am working harder at having 'sabbath' time. Or time to just be. I think it is taking a bit longer to rework old patterns and habits. But I am aware and will keep working on this one.
This year I happened to be at church in Spencer (even though I live three hours away) for the service of Epiphany. Epiphany -- A sudden realization about the nature or meaning of something - is the official definition according to Google. For me that is a big part of the Star Gift exercise. What do we need to know about ourselves through this process? It is an opportunity to open our minds and reflect.
Like I said, these "star gifts" are beautifully constructed on construction paper made into this many point stars. If you are close enough to me or are visiting, ask to see it the next time we are together. It is usually in my purse or in my car to remind me of what I need to remember. The basket is passed through the pews and all the stars are upside down so we can't see the words. As it slowly comes toward me. I spot this amazing bright pink one. I grab it. Pass the basket to the next person. Turn it over slowly and the word is - RESTRAINT.
Well, I immediately chortle. How many lectures, looks, and sighs have I been given about restraining my tongue or my attitude? Countless amounts. One of my earliest memories is hearing the words "um....Rhonda......we don't talk about that" sometimes reinforced with a backhand. So on the surface level, I thought this was going to be interesting. Maybe this was the long awaited permission to start exacting revenge through restraint on those that are annoying me - think rope and duct tape (just kidding. Am I?)
But seriously, I have had a couple weeks to process it and many other ideas of "restraint" are coming to me. Using restraint when I speak my peace doesn't mean that I don't say what I feel. I means that I say it in a way that can communicate the meaning without hurtful words. But at the same time not holding back because I am scared of how this will affect the person or the situation When a person comes from a place of "we don't talk about that", it is really difficult to talk about it. It is breaking old habits that have worked in the past. They don't work for me anymore. Keeping it inside is not helpful or healing to any one.
So even though rope and duct tape restraint or restraint from sharing my thoughts and feelings are not what this is about, I can imagine that I will process this star gift many more times this year. I may even have an entirely different take on it by my next Epiphany.
A basket is passed around the pews with brightly colored STARS with a single word placed on them. The idea is to pick that word and it will have meaning to you throughout this next year. As a star gift, it will mean either the gifts I possess that I will use this next year or a gift that I need to recognize and obtain.
Last year my gift was "crafty". When I drew that one I was confused and it took me almost a half a year to figure that one out (and really not sure at this writing if it is correct or that was the intent). Was it because I was learning from a great teacher how to construct or re-purpose things? Was it because I was to figure out a "crafty" way to communicate, move through and express my thoughts with others? I say both because both of those things are and have happened.
The year before that my word was "sabbath". That one didn't take me as long to work through. I "pulled" that gift at a time when I was working seven days a week and all thoughts and feelings had to do with a job. There was not time for me and reflection and being still. Many changes since then in my life and I think that I am working harder at having 'sabbath' time. Or time to just be. I think it is taking a bit longer to rework old patterns and habits. But I am aware and will keep working on this one.
This year I happened to be at church in Spencer (even though I live three hours away) for the service of Epiphany. Epiphany -- A sudden realization about the nature or meaning of something - is the official definition according to Google. For me that is a big part of the Star Gift exercise. What do we need to know about ourselves through this process? It is an opportunity to open our minds and reflect.
Like I said, these "star gifts" are beautifully constructed on construction paper made into this many point stars. If you are close enough to me or are visiting, ask to see it the next time we are together. It is usually in my purse or in my car to remind me of what I need to remember. The basket is passed through the pews and all the stars are upside down so we can't see the words. As it slowly comes toward me. I spot this amazing bright pink one. I grab it. Pass the basket to the next person. Turn it over slowly and the word is - RESTRAINT.
Well, I immediately chortle. How many lectures, looks, and sighs have I been given about restraining my tongue or my attitude? Countless amounts. One of my earliest memories is hearing the words "um....Rhonda......we don't talk about that" sometimes reinforced with a backhand. So on the surface level, I thought this was going to be interesting. Maybe this was the long awaited permission to start exacting revenge through restraint on those that are annoying me - think rope and duct tape (just kidding. Am I?)
But seriously, I have had a couple weeks to process it and many other ideas of "restraint" are coming to me. Using restraint when I speak my peace doesn't mean that I don't say what I feel. I means that I say it in a way that can communicate the meaning without hurtful words. But at the same time not holding back because I am scared of how this will affect the person or the situation When a person comes from a place of "we don't talk about that", it is really difficult to talk about it. It is breaking old habits that have worked in the past. They don't work for me anymore. Keeping it inside is not helpful or healing to any one.
So even though rope and duct tape restraint or restraint from sharing my thoughts and feelings are not what this is about, I can imagine that I will process this star gift many more times this year. I may even have an entirely different take on it by my next Epiphany.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Is this writer's block?
There are words in my head that are shooting to my fingers, but I can't make them come out. They are stuck all log jammed inside my fingertips. And as always there are emotions attached to those words. I expect to look down and I have swollen fingers with a's and m's and e's pushing against the skin.
It is very likely that they will spill out just not this morning when I have the time to tap them out onto the electronic paper. So I must find another task. Being ready and aware of the upcoming explosion.
Boom, boom, boom shake the room!
It is very likely that they will spill out just not this morning when I have the time to tap them out onto the electronic paper. So I must find another task. Being ready and aware of the upcoming explosion.
Boom, boom, boom shake the room!
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Aches and pains
Tomorrow starts my 'birthday week'. Now I don't think we should celebrate birthdays for an entire week. Normally it is just another day. However, the greater number my age, the more I may need to increase it from one day to a weekend to a FULL ON week. I declare that if I hit 90, I will celebrate a birthday month.
Once again, this age of my body has been on my mind. I know that I am not by any means OLD. I think I fit in the "middle age" category. Of course that is also about perspective. The older one gets, the range of middle age gets older.
The question of the day for me surrounds aches and pains. Is it in an inevitability that I will ALWAYS wake up in the morning with something that is stiff and sore? From my foot to my knee to my back to my shoulder -- they all take their turns at being stiff and sore in the morning. I can't remember the last time I got out of bed and thought "I feel good today".
I have tried various remedies. Medication, chiropractic, ultrasound, a new mattress...nothing seems to be working. I am going to move into acupuncture and some other alternative remedies real soon. And the idea of a hot tub has now entered my brain to be able to loosen up some of those crusty joints.
What does that tell me about the shell that is my body? I believe I had a previous blog that lamented about my frustration with this. And I still have those frustrations and regret regarding habits around exercise and eating. However, I think I may have moved in to an acceptance. I have accepted that I will be achy forever. But do I really need to feel that way?
I know reader, you will have all kinds of ideas - exercise, don't eat junk, stop drinking wine (WHAA???) - and they are excellent ideas. Today, I can't imagine an intense bit of exercising because I can barely walk most days until about 7:30 am when the fluid "gets a movin'" or coffee gets on-board. So then I get in this vicious cycle of less exercise - more pain - less exercise - more stiffness - less exercise - weight gain - negative self-talk - less exercise. UGH!
So I resolve (because it is that time of year right?) to deal with the aches and pains the best I can and move through what ever will be. To find some movement that can be done in spite of the aches - swimming perhaps? Serious about that hot tub perhaps? Drink more wine perhaps? Just kidding -- maybe.
I also need to remember a little perspective in 1910, I would have reached my life expectancy and would have been considered elderly. When you think about it that was only 100 years ago.
I will celebrate this 47th birthday (48 if you count the first one) with as much vim and vigor as I can muster and gear up for the 5-0 because it will be here BEFORE I know it. OH! MY!
Once again, this age of my body has been on my mind. I know that I am not by any means OLD. I think I fit in the "middle age" category. Of course that is also about perspective. The older one gets, the range of middle age gets older.
The question of the day for me surrounds aches and pains. Is it in an inevitability that I will ALWAYS wake up in the morning with something that is stiff and sore? From my foot to my knee to my back to my shoulder -- they all take their turns at being stiff and sore in the morning. I can't remember the last time I got out of bed and thought "I feel good today".
I have tried various remedies. Medication, chiropractic, ultrasound, a new mattress...nothing seems to be working. I am going to move into acupuncture and some other alternative remedies real soon. And the idea of a hot tub has now entered my brain to be able to loosen up some of those crusty joints.
What does that tell me about the shell that is my body? I believe I had a previous blog that lamented about my frustration with this. And I still have those frustrations and regret regarding habits around exercise and eating. However, I think I may have moved in to an acceptance. I have accepted that I will be achy forever. But do I really need to feel that way?
I know reader, you will have all kinds of ideas - exercise, don't eat junk, stop drinking wine (WHAA???) - and they are excellent ideas. Today, I can't imagine an intense bit of exercising because I can barely walk most days until about 7:30 am when the fluid "gets a movin'" or coffee gets on-board. So then I get in this vicious cycle of less exercise - more pain - less exercise - more stiffness - less exercise - weight gain - negative self-talk - less exercise. UGH!
So I resolve (because it is that time of year right?) to deal with the aches and pains the best I can and move through what ever will be. To find some movement that can be done in spite of the aches - swimming perhaps? Serious about that hot tub perhaps? Drink more wine perhaps? Just kidding -- maybe.
I also need to remember a little perspective in 1910, I would have reached my life expectancy and would have been considered elderly. When you think about it that was only 100 years ago.
I will celebrate this 47th birthday (48 if you count the first one) with as much vim and vigor as I can muster and gear up for the 5-0 because it will be here BEFORE I know it. OH! MY!
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